


I'm Like A Teacher With The Way I'm Always Trying To Get Your Attention

by hopefulundertone



Category: Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Teacher AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-12
Updated: 2015-06-12
Packaged: 2018-04-04 02:05:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4122049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopefulundertone/pseuds/hopefulundertone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pete was pretty sure half the staff room shipped them as well, from the smirks they sent him when they walked past the two of them eating. To be fair, Pete had been half sprawled over Patrick, rambling on about the latest essays and bemoaning his classes, while Patrick nodded patiently and made sympathetic noises, but still. Next time the principal organised a teacher bonding session, Urie and Weekes were going down, even if Pete had to jump on them and wrestle them while Patrick covered them with paint.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Like A Teacher With The Way I'm Always Trying To Get Your Attention

**Author's Note:**

> based on the au, "we're both teachers and our students ship us but im trying desperately to keep you from finding out" pete doesnt exactly try to keep patrick from finding out, though, hes just hopelessly oblivious.

"Alright, class dismissed. And, Daisy, can you hang back for a second?" The entire class snickered as one, filing out quickly, and the girl herself flashed a cocky grin at him, packing her bag and sauntering to the front, reminding Pete uncomfortably of himself as she crossed her arms. "Mr. Wentz? Did I do something wrong?” Her tone suggested that she knew exactly what she’d done, and wasn’t particularly ashamed or repentant.

Pete considered the question, and decided there really wasn't any way to sugarcoat it. "Did you seriously have to tell the entire school, ah, “I was crazy for Mr. Stump”?" The answering smirk that spread across her face was answer enough, and she shrugged, leaning back nonchalantly. "Well, anyone with eyes can see it, I didn’t need to tell anyone. But it's okay, everyone ships it. It's really cute!" While murdering a student was technically illegal, Pete wasn't sure it wasn't worth it right now. "Daisy, you're aware that we're just friends, right? Mr. Stump is my colleague, nothing more. Totally, one hundred percent platonic."

"I know that's what you say." If she wasn't his star student, Pete was pretty sure she'd be kicked out of his class in a hot second, but Daisy Johnson was practically Shakespeare come again, when she put the effort in at least, and she knew it. Grinning at him, she crossed her arms and shrugged, and he was actually considering strangling her when a soft knock came, followed by a familiar face popping around the door. "Oh, sorry! I didn't know you were doing consultations."

"Trick, no, wait-" Pete wanted to slam his head against a wall, but settled for dropping it into his hands. "It's okay, Mr. Stump! I should get to my next class." He raised his head to see Daisy wink at him and saunter out, nodding respectfully to Patrick.

"Hey, you okay? What was that about?" Patrick perched on the desk next to him and patted his shoulder comfortingly, a warm hand rubbing light circles into his neck almost unconsciously, just like any platonic friend, right?

"It's just Daisy. She thinks she can do what she wants in my class, just because she gets straight A's for Lit." Pete pointedly didn't mention the shipping, because really, it was ridiculous. Their love was completely platonic. Well, not Pete’s, but definitely Patrick’s. Like, 1000%. Patrick just looked thoughtful, tugging on his fedora absentmindedly, and for the umpteenth time, Pete stopped himself from reaching out to squeeze his hand, because seriously, ridiculous. "That's odd. Daisy's usually well behaved in my class." And Pete knew that, because everybody was well behaved in Patrick's class. He was the kind of teacher people couldn't help but love, from his overflowing enthusiasm for music to friendly, understanding nature to his fucking crazy vocal range; hell, Pete would challenge anyone to know Patrick and not be in love with him. Pete certainly couldn’t resist, which had landed them in this mess in the first place.

"Are we still up for lunch?" Patrick's voice broke through his teenage-girl reverie, and Pete snapped back to attention, smiling up at him. "Yeah, yeah of course."

Maybe this would go away, now that he'd talked to Daisy. He could always hope.

 

-

 

It hadn't gone away. If anything, the rumours had gotten worse, and Pete was pretty sure half the staff room shipped them as well, from the smirks they sent him when they walked past the two of them eating. To be fair, Pete had been half sprawled over Patrick, rambling on about the latest essays and bemoaning his classes, while Patrick nodded patiently and made sympathetic noises, but still. Next time the principal organised a teacher bonding session, Brendon Urie and Dallon Weekes were going down, even if Pete had to jump on them and wrestle them while Patrick covered them with paint. It'd gotten to the point where he'd been called to the principal's office and Gerard had sat him down and “discussed” workplace romance. Even Hurley, the most chill dude in the staff room, had pulled him aside and given him the terrifying older brother talk, which ended when Pete stammered that he really wasn't at all involved with Patrick except platonically, before cutting and running. Then again, he wasn’t that surprised, Patrick was adorable enough to be considered a younger brother to practically everyone in the staff room. At the very least, he was oblivious to all of it, both the shipping, which was a recent development, and the adoring looks Pete sent his way all the time, which wasn't.

It wasn't just their colleagues though; practically every corner he turned while he was walking with Patrick, he heard hastily stifled giggles and soft coos, because apparently Daisy had infected the entire student body, and he'd had to wipe off giant letters spelling "PxP" on his whiteboard more than once. This was getting ridiculous.

-

 

The whole thing came to a head when they’d decided to stay late to fiddle with the instruments in the band room the night before the last day of school, because Pete could kind of play the bass, and neither of them really had much to do tomorrow, seeing as none of none of their students were going to be paying attention. They had been discussing a song that Patrick sketched out, trying to fit some of Pete's more spaced-out poetry to it, when he got up to buy them sodas from the vending machine just around the corner, and noticed the lock was secured from the outside, which, what the fuck? Pete jiggled the knob, hoping that maybe the lock was jammed, but it was clearly locked from the outside, which has never happened before, because they had an agreement with the night janitors after the last time the janitor had called security on the weird shapes in the music room, only to discover it was two nerdy teachers screwing around with the instruments. Gerard had laughed for days. With a sinking feeling, he picked up the small square of white paper that had been slipped under the door.

_Dear Pete and Patrick_

_No doubt you will have realised that you're locked in. Don't worry, it's not for the night, we'll swing around about 12, but in the meantime, try to work out whatever platonic boundaries that are holding you back from being the cutest couple around. It's really distracting._

_P.S. The principal definitely endorses this, and would also like you to please not quit working here because he loves you and this is really for your own good._

_P.P.S. We will do this as many times as necessary, so save yourselves and us a lot of trouble. Hurry it up._

The back of the note was signed with over a dozen signatures, including Brendon Urie's distinctive scrawl, matching the handwriting on the note, and the neat lettering of Andy Hurley, which he’s surprised and somewhat offended at until he sees the tiny sentence under it, which read, _I’m only supporting this because my students can’t concentrate in class anymore._

Fair enough, Pete supposed. He was wondering how to break this to Patrick before realising that he didn’t have to; Patrick was peering over his shoulder at the note, and making puzzled noises to boot, which, seriously, could he not? It was hard enough already keeping his love for Patrick on the down low while Patrick was existing, let alone being in a foot’s radius of Pete and making adorable sounds.

“What’s the note talking about? What’s going on?” Patrick looked at him, really looked, the look that meant, _I don’t care if you just boned my sister or ate my dog, you need to tell me right the fuck now_ (neither of which Pete had actually done, for the record), and Pete melted. “Uh, well. The entire school kind of ships us. Like together. Romantically. Y’know. Like, non-platonically.” He watched as Patrick took on a bemused expression, and rushed to add, “Only because they don’t have anything else to talk about. The rumour mill runs dry, they scavenge around, it’s ridiculous.” Pete smiled at the note weakly, trying to avoid Patrick’s suddenly shrewd gaze, and wriggled away from him, backing away towards the piano. “Ridiculous,” he repeated, mind a whirlwind of _well, shit_ and _fucking hell, what am I supposed to do now_ , and _he knows oh god he knows_. Then his mind kind of blanked out, which happened whenever Patrick was standing in his personal space, like he was now, advancing on Pete almost predatorily. “Pete.” And those, those were definitely Patrick’s fingers resting on his cheek, what the fuck? Almost reluctantly, Pete glanced up, breath catching at the amused expression he wore. “What-” He barely managed to get the word out before Patrick’s lips were on his, warm and soft and literally everything he’d wanted since the day they met, except better.

Oh.

_Oh._

“Really?” Pete’s hands slid up of their own accord, cradling Patrick’s jaw as he rested his forehead against Patrick’s, breath uneven. Patrick just hummed in response, mirroring the wide grin that split Pete’s face. “Took you long enough.” And leaned forward again, swiping his tongue across the seam of Patrick’s lips until they parted, licking away in his huffed laugh.

 

-

 

Around midnight, a car pulled up to the school parking lot and two men got out, bickering loudly.

“I can’t believe you were going to leave without me! You were going to deprive me of the chance to see the lovebirds!”

“It’s midnight! I was going to let you sleep, like a normal person!”

“I was in the same fucking bed as you!”

“Well, whose idea was that?”

“Ours.”

“...”

“Shut up, Dall. Let’s just go get the platonically frustrated duo out of there before they stink up the band room with their sexual tension.”

The taller one nodded, and they disappeared into the school building, ascending the stairs.

“Uh, Brendon?”

“What?”

“I don’t think they’re platonically frustrated anymore.”

A clicking sound, and out of the band room, clothes in several states of disarray, came Pete and Patrick, followed by a thumping sound, and a loud, “Fuck you!”

-

Presently, the two men returned to the car.

“You okay?”

“Yeah. Pete packs a mean punch.”

“At least it worked.”

“Yup. I’ll text Gerard. Mission PINASFG accomplished.”

“Still a stupid name.”

“Shut up.”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> PINASFG- platonic is not a synonym for gay.  
> in other news, this was shittily written and then left to rot without an ending for a while, before i brushed it down and tacked on some stuff. hope you enjoyed!


End file.
